80+ Hilarious Valentine's Day Quotes 2024 (2024)

Valentine's Day is celebrated on February 14th every year. Valentine's Day is all about love, affection, and, yes, humor too! If you're looking for a way to add a dash of joy and laughter to your celebration, our collection of funny Valentine's Day quotes is just the ticket.

Our collection of funny Valentine's Day quotes includes humorous and witty ones for friends and couples, funny greeting card messages, funny quotes for WhatsApp, and many more. We also have images that you can share with your partner this Valentine's.

They're perfect for bringing a little joy into your day. Put them on your cards, share them with your loved ones and close ones, or even post them for all your friends online. So, take it easy, get comfy, and let's enjoy some lighthearted jokes about love together this Valentine's Day.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Table Of Contents

• Humorous Valentines Day Quotes

• Witty Valentine Day Quotes

• Funny Valentines Day Quotes For Friends

• Funny Valentines Day Quotes For Couples

• Funny Valentine’s Day Video Wish

• Funny Valentines Day Greeting Card Messages

• Funny Valentines Day Quotes For WhatsApp

• How to book a personalised celebrity video wish for Valentine's on Tring?

Humorous Valentines Day Quotes

Spark laughter and love this Valentine's Day with these delightful funny quotes. After all, they say laughter is the key to the heart! Below is a compilation of 15 humorous quotes to tickle your Valentine's funny bone:

1. I love being married. It's so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. - Rita Rudner

2. Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties. - Jules Renard

3. All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. - Charles M. Schulz

4. Love is a game that two can play and both can win. - Eva Gabor

5. Love is telling someone their hair extensions are showing. - Natasha Leggero

6. I don't understand why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine's Day. When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind is a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a weapon. - Anonymous

7. Love is what you've been through with somebody. - James Thurber

8. Marry a man your own age; as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight. - Phyllis Diller

9. Love is a sweet dream and marriage is the alarm clock. - Jewish Proverb

10. My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to. - Rita Rudner

11. Love is sharing your popcorn. - Charles Schultz

12. If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question? - Lily Tomlin

13. Love is like a tornado, picks you up off your feet and sometimes takes half your house. - Unknown

14. I love you more than coffee, but please don't make me prove it. - Elizabeth Evans

15. Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand. - Unknown

Witty Valentines Day Quotes

Add a touch of wit and wisdom to your Valentine's Day celebrations with our collection of 15 clever and amusing quotes. These charming quotes can turn up the fun and laughter in your romantic moments. Here's a delightful mix of wit and love to win your Valentine's heart:

1. If you have only one smile in you, give it to the people you love. - Maya Angelou

2. In love, one and one are one. - Jean-Paul Sartre

   See Also

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3. To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. - Oscar Wilde

4. True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked. - Erich Segal

5. You can't put a price tag on love, but you can on all its accessories. - Melanie Clark

6. Love – a temporary insanity curable by marriage. - Ambrose Bierce

7. A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. - Mignon McLaughlin

8. Love is like pi – natural, irrational, and very important. - Lisa Hoffman

9. To be in love is merely to be in a state of perceptual anesthesia. - H.L. Mencken

10. People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy. - Bob Hope

11. Without Valentine’s Day, February would be… well, January. - Jim Gaffigan

12. Love is being stupid together. - Paul Valéry

13. Kisses kept are wasted; love is to be tasted. - Edmund Vance Cooke

14. Love is the magician that pulls man out of his own hat. - Ben Hecht

15. Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love. - Albert Einstein

Funny Valentines Day Quotes For Friends

Friendship is a special kind of love and what better way to celebrate this Valentine's Day with your pals than with a dash of humor. These 15 funny Valentine's Day quotes are sure to make your friends chuckle, giggle, or even burst into laughter!

1. Valentine's Day: the holiday that reminds you that if you don't have a special someone, you're alone. - Lewis Black

2. Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you’re in. - Richard Jeni

3. I love asking kids what they want to be when they grow up because I’m still looking for ideas. - Unknown

4. Spending Valentine's Day with my favorite person: myself. - Unknown

5. Love is a lot like a backache: it doesn't show up on X-rays, but you know it's there. - George Burns

6. Valentine's Day is when a lot of married people are reminded what a poor shot cupid really is. - Anonymous

7. I wish the Valentine's Day candy went on sale as quickly as the Christmas candy does. - Unknown

8. Love is like a faucet, it turns off and on. - Billie Holiday

9. I used to be a hopeless romantic. I am still hopeless but least there are no more romantics involved. - Anonymous

10. Every pizza is a personal pizza if you try hard enough and believe in yourself. - Bill Murray

11. Give me a hot drink, and I'm happy. Hot cider, hot chocolate, coffee… I like all winter beverages! - Alison Sudol

12. Valentine's Day is my favorite holiday because your significant other has to purchase you a nice gift or they know you'll freak out. - Unknown

13. I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake. - Unknown

14. Valentine's Day: spreading unrealistic expectations of love since the 15th Century. - Unknown

15. There should be a holiday for all the brave people who show up to work on Mondays. - Unknown

Funny Valentines Day Quotes For Couples

Celebrate the lighter side of love with these 15 funny Valentine's Day quotes for couples. These humorous tidbits perfectly capture the playful nature of love and are perfect for sharing a laugh with your significant other, making your special day even more memorable!

1. Marriage is like vitamins: we supplement each other's minimum daily requirements. - Kathy Mohnke

2. We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love. - Dr. Seuss

3. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? - Unknown

4. True love is singing karaoke 'Under Pressure' and letting the other person sing the Freddie Mercury part. - Mindy Kaling

5. What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? About 30 pounds. - Cindy Garner

6. Romance is an exercise in myth-building. When two eyes meet, they grow large, then grotesquely swollen. And the rest of the world quiets. - Jandy Nelson

7. Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything else. - Jean Kerr

8. Love is a two-way street constantly under construction. - Carroll Bryant

9. The four most important words in any marriage: I'll do the dishes. - Unknown

10. Love is the same as like except you feel sexier. - Judith Viorst

11. Love is an electric blanket with somebody else in control of the switch. - Cathy Carlyle

12. I love you more than I hate everything else. - Rainbow Rowell

13. An archaeologist is the best husband any woman can have; the older she gets the more interested he is in her. - Agatha Christie

14. I thought that I would never marry... then you changed everything, and now my only fear is that we spend eternity slightly annoyed with one another, in utopia. - D.D. Barant

15. If love is a blunder, then it means that the biggest fault in my life is loving you. - Will Ferrell
    

Funny Valentines Day Video Wish

Are you ready to swap out the usual sentimentality for a bit of humor this Valentine's Day? Make this Valentine's Day extra special and funny for your partner. Surprise them with a celebrity video wish from famous Bollywood stars, influencers, movie stars and many more. Along with the below mentioned celebrities, we have a list of 12,000+ celebrities that you can choose from. Laugh out loud, smile with your friends or lover, and let these funny wishes make you happy and feel good this Valentine's Day! Book your wish now!

Funny Valentines Day Greeting Card Messages

Valentine's Day isn't just for sappy poems or grand gestures of romance. It's also a time for sharing a good chuckle with your loved one. Inside each greeting card, let there be a giggle or a snort of laughter with these 15 funny Valentine's Day messages.

1. I love you more than coffee, but please don't make me prove it. Happy Valentine's Day!

2. You're the peanut butter to my jelly – a little nutty, but spreadably sweet. Happy Valentine's Day!

3. I know you love me. But if you decide to leave me for Tom Hardy or Scarlett Johansson, I won't hold it against you. Much.

4. Happy Valentine's to the only person I'm slightly less fond of than Netflix.

5. Are you a banana? Because I find you a-peeling. Happy Valentine's Day!

6. You must be a magician because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears. Poof! Happy Valentine's!

7. I'm so happy I found someone as weird as me. Let's be odd together. Happy Valentine's Day!

8. I'd find the end of the rainbow just to share my pot of gold with you. But let's be honest, I'd rather we just get some pizza.

9. I love you like a fat kid loves cake, but don't make me choose 'cause that would just be cruel. Happy Valentine's Day!

10. Happy Valentine's Day to my significant otter!

11. I'd pause my favorite game for you. Yes, you're that special. Happy Valentine's Day!

12. For Valentine’s Day, let’s enjoy a romantic candlelit dinner. Your choice: fast food or frozen pizza?

13. Happy Valentine's Day to my favorite partner in crime. Who else will help me eat all this chocolate?

14. Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not really a poet but I'm crazy about you.

15. Happy Valentine’s Day to someone who knows absolutely everything about me and is still not in prison.

Funny Valentines Day Quotes For WhatsApp

Add a splash of humor to your WhatsApp status or chat this Valentine's Day! These 15 funny Valentine's Day quotes are perfect for eliciting a laugh or a smile from your loved ones, friends, and even yourself. It's time to spread some Valentine's Day cheer, with a pinch of comedy!

1. Congratulations on being my only Valentine that isn’t a cat.

2. Love is a lot like a toothache. It doesn't show up on X-rays, but you know it's there.

3. Romance is basically just two people who don't mind each other's morning breath.

4. Valentine’s Day is a great day for me, I can officially eat a whole box of chocolates by myself.

5. My love for you is like pi… never-ending.

6. I love you like a business cat loves closing deals.

7. If you’ll be my Valentine, I promise not to step on your white shoes.

8. Sorry I didn't get you chocolates for Valentine's Day, but if you want something sweet, I’m right here.

9. Roses are red, fitness is great, I would've got you chocolate, but you need to lose some weight.

10. Love doesn't make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.

11. Happy Valentine's Day to someone who takes fewer selfies than me.

12. Happy Valentine's Day to everyone who was afraid of talking to their crush today.

13. I love you just the way I am.

14. Love is whispering sweet nothings to the wine bottle.

15. Valentine's Day – the holiday of love, or as singles call it – 'Just another Thursday'.

Also don't forget to check out other Valentine's Day pages for similar wishes, quotes and many more

How to book a personalised celebrity video wish for Valentine's on Tring?

Above are a few ideas on how to wish your partner a Happy Valentine’s Day. Along with these wishes, you could also surprise your partner with a celebrity video wish from famous Bollywood stars.

Make their day memorable with the most special form of wish imaginable.What’s better than your husband getting a celebrity shoutout as a wish from the celebrities mentioned below. This is your chance to get a celebrity to record and send a Valentine's Day wish to your lover!

Exciting right? With more than 12,000+ celebrities on Tring, you can Book with ease and make memories with your favourite person. Book your wish now!