It’s the day of love, and for many it is a time to show your love and appreciation for friends, family, pets and partners. Couples post pictures with their partners on social media, showing off their relationship. But for some, who may not be with a partner, or for those who have family and friend troubles, the holiday can be stressful or frustrating.
Adrian Low, a chartered psychologist in Hong Kong, told us that self-love “forms the foundation of our overall well-being and mental health”.
How much do you know about the origin of Valentine’s Day?
“When we practise self-love, we cultivate a positive relationship with ourselves, which has numerous benefits,” he said. He listed out some of those advantages:
Enhanced self-esteem: self-love helps us develop a positive perception of ourselves, which boosts our self-esteem. We become more confident in our abilities and value our worth.
Improved resilience: when we love ourselves, we are better equipped to handle life’s challenges. Self-love provides us with a sense of inner strength and resilience, enabling us to bounce back from setbacks and cope with stress more effectively.
Better relationships: self-love allows us to set healthy boundaries and prioritise our needs. This, in turn, improves our relationships with others by fostering mutual respect and preventing co-dependency or resentment.
Increased self-care: prioritise activities that maintain a healthy lifestyle and engage in activities that bring joy. This helps us take care of our physical and emotional well-being.
Reduced self-criticism: self-love helps us develop a compassionate and understanding attitude towards ourselves. We become less self-critical and more forgiving of our flaws and mistakes, leading to increased self-acceptance and reduced negative self-talk.
February 14 can be a reminder to appreciate your positive qualities! Photo: Shutterstock
Here are some fun self-care and self-love tips for your Valentine’s Day!
Block out time in your day to do something you love
As we are often busy with school, friends, family and extracurriculars, sometimes our passions or hobbies fall by the wayside. One great way to show yourself love is to reignite your favourite interests.
“Setting aside dedicated time for activities that bring you joy and fulfilment is a crucial aspect of self-love,” Low added. “It allows you to prioritise your own happiness and nourish your passions and interests.”
Now, we’re not saying you have to paint a million-dollar masterpiece or write a memoir. If you love K-dramas, get a comfortable blanket and catch up on the most recent shows. Spend some time with your pet, take a refreshing walk outside or play a game with a sibling. Whatever you decide to do, choose something that you feel excited about.
Top 10: Which food is the best to replace chocolate for Valentine’s Day?
Write down your favourite qualities about yourself
So often, we look in the mirror and hyper-analyse our faces and bodies. In a world wrought with social media filters and unrealistic standards, it is easy to overlook the beautiful parts of our appearances and personalities.
Sit down and make a list of all the things you like about yourself. Start with the intangible: Are you a good listener? Do you try hard in school? Are you good at a particular hobby? Are you curious?
Note down these things, and don’t be afraid to add lots of qualities. This is a practise that can help in boosting self-esteem and self-appreciation.
Writing down things that you like about yourself can be a positive exercise. Photo: Shutterstock
Journal your biggest accomplishments from the last year
It is important to show ourselves love by acknowledging our accomplishments. Get yourself a warm, delicious drink or a snack, take out a piece of paper and reflect on the time gone by.
Low told us: “Reflecting on your successes can remind you of your capabilities and reinforce a sense of self-worth.”
Don’t worry if you didn’t win a big prize, ace all your tests or pick up a grand new skill. You may have read some great books – that’s an accomplishment. Maybe you overcame a fear or made some new friends. Dig deep and highlight the big and small wins from last year.
Sunny Chan Wing-san on bringing love to his ‘Table for Six 2’ movie
Buy yourself a small gift
Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to mean giving flowers and chocolates to a special someone. If there is an item you have your eye on, why not buy for yourself? Occasionally, it’s okay to indulge and get yourself a nice gift.
“Treating yourself to a small gift can be a tangible way of showing self-appreciation and care,” Low said. “It serves as a reminder that you deserve to be treated kindly and can contribute to a positive self-image.”
Alternatively, if you cannot think of something you have been meaning to buy or don’t have the money to spare, make something – knit a hat for yourself, bake a mug cake, or get crafty.
You can buy yourself flowers or chocolate! Photo: Shutterstock
Dedicate time to a special self-care activity
Low emphasised the importance of physical and emotional care, which can nurture a positive relationship with yourself. He also pointed out that self-care is individualistic, “so it’s important to explore different strategies and find what works best for each [person]”.
For some, the best self-care is a long, hot shower. For others, it may be getting your nails done or getting a facial. Still others might relish cooking a comforting meal for themselves. Regardless of your self-care activity, take an hour or two to indulge in something that makes you feel relaxed, energised or refreshed.
