Are You Missing Someone? Here's How to Cope (2024)

When you are missing someone, there's no denying the raw emotion that you feel. You can't get it out of your head; it lingers, like an annoying fly buzzing around in the summertime. Missing someone is quite common, but what you do when you feel that way can vary.

Learn why you might be missing people who are no longer in your life, and what to do when you miss someone (to deal with all of the emotions). We also discuss how to deal with missing someone even if they don't miss you back.

Effects of Missing Someone

As humans, we naturally connect to people and build bonds and relationships over time. If these bonds or relationships are broken or lost, you might feel like there is a void or emptiness in your life. Missing someone can also affect you physically.

Feelings of loss can increase stress, which reduces immune system function and leaves your body more susceptible to viruses and bugs. They can also lead to high blood pressure, heartburn, changes in appetite, and trouble sleeping, potentially even making current health conditions worse.

When You Miss Someone, Can They Feel It?

While we could find no scientific evidence of this, some people believe that the answer is yes and that if you have dreams about the other person often or can feel their presence, these are signs that they're missing you.

What Causes Us to Miss Someone?

"Whenyoumisssomeone,it meansyoureally care about the person andyouvalue them," says Katie Lasson, Clinical Sexologist & Relationship Advisor."Youneed this person in your life because it makesyoufeel better andyouare happier. That's whyyoumisssomebody."

We can miss people for a multitude of reasons, but once that emotion arises, it can be hard to shake it.

When there are fresh wounds of hurt, anything can trigger you. Emotions run wild when you miss someone and anything can spark up old memories. The mind is powerful with the amount of information, memories, and emotions it can hold.

April Maccario, Relationship Expert & Founder of Ask April, states that places, food, songs, scents, and even random things can make us miss someone. Inevitably, these things lead us to reminisce. However, Maccario believes it is crucial to learn what you can do when you feel those emotions.

When You Realize You Are Missing Someone

Really owning how you feel is key. When you miss someone, don't run from that feeling. You may miss someone who has passed away, someone who is incarcerated, someone who was once a close friend, or simply someone who has moved away. Whatever the case may have been or currently is, something changed.

One thing about life is that it keeps going. So, cherishing memories is perfectly fine, but allowing those memories to hold you back from moving forward is not helpful.

Lasson believes it's also okay to think of a personyoumiss—to recall the nice times, some funny moments, and everything else. The most important thing is not to overthink or spend too much time dwelling on the memories because the goal is to feel better and not hurt or sad.

Missing Someone Who Doesn't Miss You Back

Knowing that someone doesn't miss you as much as you miss them is not a great feeling, but what can you do? Cry? Get depressed? Lose sleep? It's possible that all of those will occur and it's perfectly okay to feel what you feel.

Once you allow yourself to feel a range of emotions, you can then begin to move forward.

"Obviously, it [not being missed in return] is a sad feeling," says Sonya Schwartz, a relationship expert and founder of Her Norm, "but life must carry on. We can't make things happen on our own. Simply put, trust the process."

The best thing to do in circ*mstances like this is to keep moving forward, no matter how much it hurts. Eventually, the pain will fade and you will find someone who can appreciate you for all that you are. Never lose hope. You are worthy of genuine happiness and love.

What to Do When You Miss Someone

Coping with missing someone can be brutal to the heart, especially if you really loved (or still love) that person. But just like heartache, the feeling of missing someone won't last forever.

Coping Tips When You're Missing Someone

Maccario offers some things you can do to cope with the feeling of missing someone:

  • Accept and understand what you are feeling and try to express yourself
  • Engage in activities that can help you divert your attention and mood
  • Interact with other people and make new connections

Moving forward is always the best policy when you aren't able to rekindle relationships or get rid of the feeling of missing someone.

Doing things out of your comfort zone will also be beneficial as you are opening yourself up to new possibilities, new experiences, and the chance to meet new people.

Turn Inward

Facing yourself in the rawest form can be scary, but life-changing. There is healing in dealing with hard issues, and missing someone can be quite painful.

When you miss someone, it can affect your day, your mood, and your overall outlook on life. So, ask yourself why you miss that person. Ask yourself how missing them affects you. Be honest in your thoughts and decide if you're ready to begin moving on.

Write a Letter

Letters always bring clarity to cloudy situations and are great outlets to express yourself freely. Writing a letter (which you don't have to send) can allow you to say everything you would want to say if you had the opportunity to speak in person.

A major benefit of writing a letter is that you don't have to hold back anything, and you'll feel relieved afterward.

Meditate

There's no greater noise than when your mind is cluttered with endless thoughts of someone you miss. You find it hard to get anything done because you're consumed with endless thoughts of that person and the memories and experiences you've shared.

Try meditation to make peace with those thoughts. If you really tune into yourself, you'll figure out why you miss that person and get to the bottom of why you aren't in communication at the moment. Meditation offers an opportunity to see things clearly.

Tell the Person That You Miss Them

Sometimes you just have to talk to the person you've been missing. If you're feeling brave and are capable, talking to the person who's causing such drastic emotions might be the route for you.

Go to the person, respectfully, and have an honest and heartfelt conversation. You can be direct about the fact that you miss them. Who knows? It's possible that they've been missing you too and just didn't know how to communicate that with you or were too fearful to do so.

Telling someone you miss them might unlock an opportunity to make amends and revitalize your relationship.

Redirect Your Energy

You may not see it in the beginning, but some relationships have to end because they've run their course. You could miss them terribly but it's possible that the relationship was toxic. Or, maybe one of you had to move and now you can no longer meet up as frequently as you once did or at all.

After you feel your emotions, instead of wallowing in them, redirect your energy and be thankful for what you do have. Remind yourself of the people you have in your life and focus on the positive things you have going on.

A Word From Verywell

Grief is a part of life. Don't allow people to control your life and affect it in such a huge capacity that it consumes you. You may feel at your lowest, but you are stronger than you think. Allow yourself time to feel down and out, that's expected and normal—but don't get stuck there. If you're finding it difficult to cope with missing someone, reach out to a mental health professional.

Are You Missing Someone? Here's How to Cope (2024)

FAQs

Are You Missing Someone? Here's How to Cope? ›

Coping Tips When You're Missing Someone

How to tell someone you miss them without saying it? ›

Actions speak louder than words. Show your longing through thoughtful gestures. Send them a care package with items that hold sentimental value or remind you of shared memories. Personalise it with handwritten notes, expressing the significance behind each item.

What do you say when you miss someone so much? ›

You mean a lot to me.”

Express those feelings by sending them a quick, heartfelt message. “Missing you has made me realize how much you mean to me.” “You mean so much to me. Life is just more fun with you around!”

What to say instead of "I miss you"? ›

"I long for you." "I yearn for you." "I pine for you." "I crave your presence." "I feel your absence." "I am longing for you." "I am missing you dearly." "I am missing your company."

How do you say I miss you in a meaningful way? ›

I'll hold you in my heart, till I can hold you in my arms.” If there's an approaching day or time when you'll be together again, use this quote to convey your anticipation. I miss you in ways that not even words can understand.” I miss you deeply, unfathomably, senselessly, terribly.”

Can someone feel when you miss them? ›

There is currently no scientific evidence that this type of extrasensory perception (ESP) exists. While it may be unlikely that someone can sense that you miss them, believing that they do may be a way to cope with your own emotions.

Does absence make a man miss you? ›

Does Absence Make a Man Miss You? Anyone who's ever been away from their loved ones knows for a fact that absence makes the heart grow fonder. So, it's comforting to know that science confirms what we already know empirically.

How do I stop obsessing over someone I miss? ›

Talk to a Therapist

“Seek out a therapist for professional guidance. Ask them to question your thoughts and help you gain a different perspective on the situation. Often, when we are obsessing over someone, our thoughts can become distorted and it is helpful to have an outside perspective to challenge them.”

What is the secret code for I miss you? ›

607: I Miss You.

Is it needy to tell someone you miss them? ›

Sharing that you miss someone shows you're open and honest about your feelings and that you deeply value your connection. However, it's essential to strike a balance so your words feel like a gift of love rather than a burden. This delicate communication requires tact and understanding.

When you miss someone so much, it hurts.? ›

When you miss someone, your body and brain go through a painful response. The grieving process may affect your appetite, ability to sleep, and even your brain chemistry, too.

How do you cry when you miss someone? ›

Put on sad music.

If you ask someone for advice on how to make yourself cry, “listen to sad music” is an obvious answer — precisely because it's usually pretty effective.

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